Entering the world of blogging...

...late, just like I do everything else in my life! So, it's 2009 and I am JUST NOW jumping on the crazy train that is blogging. Why you ask? Because I am about two steps behind everyone else...always! But, I figure, I love to write and have been neglecting that part of myself so why not, right? Just jump out there and do it. So, here it goes...

I was going to take this opportunity to tell a little (ok, alot) about myself and where I am coming from and what I hope to accomplish with this here blog but my mind is elsewhere tonight so I will come back to that. No one will be reading this for a while (or possibly ever) so that part might not actually count anyway. I want to talk about the movie I watched tonight instead and how it made me feel.

I watched Nick and Nora's Infinate Playlist tonight (see, I told you...two steps behind everyone). I recorded it about a week or so ago and just sat down long enough to watch it. I was attracted to it from the previews because it seemed to be about people that really love music, which they do. And since I am a music lover, I figured it would be right up my alley. And it was, but for a much different reason. I love a good love story and am always swept away by the idea that you can meet someone and have an instant attraction, an attraction that is so obvious that the people around you can't help but comment on the fact that there is something between you two. I think we are all drawn to this idea because frankly, it makes it easy. Easy to pick someone, easy to feel that you've made the right choice, easy to trust that what you are feeling is real and that it will turn into a love that is safe and comfortable. This, my friends, is not reality. Or is it.

I have only had this happen to me twice in my almost 30 (gulp) years. Both times it was obvious that there was something there but circumstances prevented it from growing into what it could be. The truth of the matter is this...sometimes, no matter how wise we think we are and no matter how hard we try to make the right choice, sometimes we take our own road instead of God's and end up with the wrong person. We miss our soulmate. And this is a very, very lonely place to be.

As I watched the movie tonight, I couldn't help but wish for two things...the first was to be in my early twenties again, so that I could live the carefree type of life that they did in the movie. The second was that I had allowed God to direct me to "the one" He had set aside for me, instead of getting impatient and taking matters into my own hands. Which, let me tell you, almost NEVER works!!

This blog may not turn into anything other than a place for me to record the craziness that swirls around in my head everyday. Maybe it will turn into the thing that actually motivates me to write the book that I know God wants me to write but that I have been too scared to start working on. Or maybe, just maybe, it will be a place that someone, even if just one person, stumbles upon and learns a thing or two about how to look out for themselves in this world and how to live a little more like He wants us to.

For now, good night.
Nichole